The furore over immigration came to a sudden end yesterday after it was announced that immigrants would now be called expats.
In what could best be described as a re-branding move, the newly-named expats decided there was too much of a stigma around the word ‘immigrant’ and set up changing how they were perceived.
It seems to have been a very simple plan which has brought social harmony to the UK because UK citizens living abroad were never considered immigrants. Their move was socially acceptable because they were expats.
This change in opinion can be easily explained by Croydon’s resident linguistic expert Sam Synonym.
“Words have a magical ability,” he said. “Expat and immigrant mean exactly the same thing but if you tell English people other countries have a problem with English people coming to live there, they could make it sound so much better simply by calling them an expat rather than immigrant, which has mostly negative connotations.”